Writing a third Modern Family episode: more storylines.

In my last post I wrote about the storyline involving Mitchell and Claire. I thought it was a great idea, but we still need at least two more storylines. This time let's concentrate on those and hope that we can come up with stuff that makes sense.

This is going to be my third script and since my first two didn't have anything to do with Luke, I thought it would be about time that I'd write a storyline that gives him a chance to do something that's hopefully worthwhile.

So, I did come up with a pretty good idea about Luke, Alex and Haley, but there was a potential problem with the storyline.  What I mean by that is that the episode that aired two weeks ago also had a storyline about Luke getting a girlfriend - a coincidence indeed.

At first I thought that, meh, I have to say goodbye to the whole thing, but since the execution (S4e11) wasn't really good - Luke was uncharacteristically rude in it - I reconsidered and decided that my idea was still decent enough. The writers certainly didn't get it right and let's not forget that the backstory for Luke was missing too.

In my Luke storyline, he is supposed to go on a date, but because he doesn't apparently have much experience, the girls want to have their say too. Alex and Haley will try to help him as best as sisters only can. Of course helping in this case means complicating things and confusing Luke to the point that he doesn't know who he is anymore.

The one special thing about this storyline is that it's supposed to be an homage to one of those classic episodes from 'The Simpsons'. Well, to be more precise, an homage to a classic moment on the show - that you might not remember.

But still, we need at least one more storyline for the episode. One that includes Jay, Cameron, Phil, Gloria and/or Manny. So many possibilities and yet it's not that easy to come up with stuff that would have some kind of a connection to the Mitchell & Claire storyline.

In a way I'm tempted to go for another Fizbo that would involve Phil and Cameron, but I have to make a decision on that once I start writing. I'm also thinking about writing a storyline for Jay & Gloria in which they try to agree on where they should go on their vacation. But those are just possibilities that I'm not so sure of.

Another possibility would be to put Cameron and Jay together and give them a problem that they would have to figure out. Maybe it would have something to do with exercise. Or maybe they'd go to a race track.

In that case this would leave us with Manny, Phil and Gloria. Another episode with Phil/Gloria and sexual innuendo? I'm not sure I want that to happen. I think we have seen enough of that already so perhaps I have to come up with something else.

Who really created 'Two and a Half Men'?

Oh my, I managed to find this absolute gem from: http://www.natpe.org/natpe/images/pdf/2003pilotbible.pdf

You know what's so awesome about this? It seems to confirm the widespread rumor in Hollywood that the real creator of 2 1/2 Men isn't the person or persons that we're being told.

Remember that 'officially' the show is created by Chuck Lorre and Lee Aronsohn. They are the ones that get the big money from the syndication deal, since they are the 'creators'.

The problem here is that according to this official  press release from 2003, the pilot was written by Eric Lapidus. If you write the pilot, then you're basically the creator of the show.

So, how is it possible that the guy who wrote the pilot didn't even get a shared created by credit for Two and a Half Men?

I think someone should ask Chuck Lorre. Since he's probably still reading this blog: Chuck, what's going on in here?

Writing a third Modern Family spec script.

I thought I'd write one more Modern Family script because I don't really have anything meaningful to do at the moment. I haven't figured out all the storylines yet, except for the one that has to do with Claire and Mitchell.

In my opinion one of the most interesting storylines so far has been in episode s01e07, 'En Garde', in which it was revealed that Claire and Mitchell used to be figure skaters (in pairs) when they were kids.

Now, I don't know about you, but I liked Claire and Mitchell bonding so much that I thought it would be nice if we'd be able to revisit that subject matter again.  We haven't seen these two together much after that, have we?

So, in order to make this storyline interesting and relevant, I thought it would be really nice to write in the guy in the picture above, Brian Boitano. Mitchell and Claire were figure skaters, Brian Boitano the olympic gold medalist still is one.

This could be so much fun - and at the same it could be a really serious storyline too. Maybe Boitano actually knew our 'fire & nice' couple 25 years ago.  Perhaps it's time catch up on things and see how life has treated these people.

I think the storyline is almost bound to be funny and relevant because almost everyone knows the South Park song 'What would Brian Boitano do?' I'm sure we could find someone to sing it. Cameron & Mitchell might want to give it a go for example.

But the story could also be down to earth and give the characters more depth. I'm pretty sure our figure skating star would be proud of our environmental lawyer Mitchell and home mom Claire. Perhaps he would feel a bit sad about his own life (for the sake of the story).

As I said, I haven't figured out the other two storylines yet, but this one idea seems so good that I think I have a responsibility to write the script. It almost feels like the idea is too good to be true... 

Anyway, here's the song if you haven't heard or seen it before.

Another Modern Family spec script.

I know I was supposed to publish my second Modern Family spec at some point. So here it is:

http://www.scribd.com/doc/179356159/Modern-Family-House-of-Cards-Fix-pdf

The characters on the show have always been a bit two-dimensional so I tried my best to make them a bit more believable in this script. Whether I succeeded is of course another story.

When it comes to the script, the Mitchell & Cam storyline is pretty straightforward. So is the one with Jay & Phil going to the charity auction. The Haley & Alex storyline, however, was a lot trickier to write.

Story A: Mitchell's big day in court. Since we hadn't seen Mitchell doing any lawyering before, I thought it was about time. So I gave him a big case, and made him afraid of the whole thing. Closing arguments, huh..

I guess this one was somewhat tricky too, because I couldn't discuss the specifics of the case. I also brought Cameron with him, which I thought wasn't necessarily that plausible, but since Mitchell's car didn't start, maybe it was okay that I kept them together.

I think the storyline is about emotions and not about the actual case or the details. That's why when Mitchell gives his speech, we can't really get to hear what he's actually saying. We simply don't know enough about the case so music and gestures it is.  

Story B: Jay & Phil go to a charity. I can't remember where I got this idea from, but since Jay is so rich, I thought it would be fun if he'd do something with that money.. and be a bit childlike. Maybe he was really missing that one card when he was a kid. Besides it's a charity (to soften the motivation).

I thought it would be best if I'd let Phil join with Jay. The trick is that Claire calls Jay and asks him to look after her husband, because Phil wants to go too and we know Phil. Once they get together and no women are around, Jay tells Phil what's going on. (to get the story straight)

When they get to the auctioning event, there are two 'wants' going on. Jay wants that card and the audience probably wants to see Phil make bids. So I achieved this by creating an obstacle when a business acquaintance of Jay's shows up. For business reasons Jay told that person he's almost broke..

So, we have an obstacle, which is a good thing. Next we get an observation from Phil, who says that he can do the bidding for Jay. He sees the opportunity too, so Phil does the bidding. Therefore Jay gets what he wants and so does the audience. Obstacle, observation, opportunity.

Story C: is the most difficult one to write. It starts on page six and ends on page twenty. So it's the last that gets going and the first that finishes (if the tag doesn't count). It's basically about Haley being a bit depressed and wanting to spend time with her sister.

Haley joins Alex who's acting like a good girl once again. She is doing her 'pick one piece of litter a day' stuff. Haley is sad and says that nothing goes her way in life. Everyone is against her, the whole world. So Alex suggests that Haley could make the world a bit better place, one piece of litter at a time.

The really tricky part here is that there's not that much time for Haley to feel somewhat happier about herself and to believe in what Alex is doing. It wasn't easy to write stuff that culminated in Alex going against her good girl image and fake smoking a cigarrette on purpose.

Anyway, Claire sees this and there's the confrontation based on a misunderstanding. At least the idea is pretty funny. Claire thinking that they smoke and Haley reinforcing the belief and saying that, ahem, 'what they do' is awesome.

This is the first draft, not polished and not really spell-checked, but I guess I can do those things later.

Angus and Charlie said it like it is.

I had decided that I wouldn't write anything about Angus T. Jones calling Two and A Half Men 'filth' and saying that we shouldn't watch it. 

Unfortunately, I then happened to read Ken Levine's completely one-sided post about the issue and decided that I need to weigh in because the whole thing makes me feel pretty mad.

Now, I'm not saying that I don't find some of the comments that Angus has made about his beliefs and religion a bit troubling, because, I think everyone perhaps should.  

Also, I'm not saying that in a somewhat normal situation I wouldn't find him to be a somewhat ungrateful person for making millions from a show and then openly trashing it. 

But we're talking about Two and A Half Men here, the ultimate flagship of lazy, unambitious, crappy writing, a show that doesn't represent any values,  a show that doesn't even pretend that it's trying to make the world a better place.

It's run by Chuck Lorre, the guy who wrote in a  public vanity card (when Charlie Sheen was in rehab) 'jokingly' that he hopes that Sheen dies before he does.

Even only based on that, I think it's more than understandable if the stars of the show at some point simply aren't able to take it anymore. (Sheen called it eight years of emotional oppression)

But what really troubles me is how the media plays this thing. According to them, anyone who walks away from 'easy' money.. ..well, that person can't be trusted.

I mean, why did Sheen walk away from a show that made him millions? Why? He must be crazy.

Now it's the same situation with Angus. He's made millions from the show. Why would he do this? He must be.. (pick your word).

The only person from the original cast who hasn't had enough is Jon Cryer. He plays Alan who is basically a man-whore on the show.

For some reason the media thinks that he is the good guy here. They think that it takes a lot of courage to take the money and not say a damn thing about the lack of morals and the lack of quality on the show.

That's not how it's supposed to go. Right?

A sitcom book that doesn't suck.

Well, I finally decided to write about a book that isn't completely useless when it comes to writing spec scripts. In fact, I would go as far as to say that 'Elephant Bucks' - by Sheldon Bull - is the best how-to sitcom book out there.

There are numerous reasons why the book is better than the rest out there and one of the most important reasons is that the book actually makes sense. By that I mean that after you read it, the chances are that you might start writing and stop procrastinating. At least that's what happened to me.

So, the book has a great section about structure. It gives you seven plot elements that you should think about when you're trying to come up with a story/storyline. (depending on your character, active or passive, these are first goal/problem, obstacle, first action, act break, second problem/goal, second action and resolution).

The reason that this section is so good and helpful is that it concentrates on characters and what motivates them. Nothing is more important than your characters wanting or needing to solve something. If your characters don't have a goal or a problem, they're stuck in a room doing nothing like Penny, Amy & Bernadette on the Big Bang Theory.

Perhaps the most important thing that I learned about structure is the 'first action', which Sheldon calls 'an unwise decision'. This decision is important, because when your character does something, ahem, unwise, that action can develope into an actual storyline - not just into a series of pointless 'and then' scenes that South Park's Trey Parker has talked about.

It is of course up to you to come up with those ideas, but 'unwise decision' is a much easier term to understand than the usual 'inciting incident'. I still haven't figured out what that really means. I don't think there's any reason to make structure intentionally difficult to understand and Sheldon, unlike others, makes it pretty easy for the reader (he really does).

The way Sheldon's book differs from all those others, is that in 'Elephant Bucks', he actually writes an episode with us (Frasier). This is such a simple idea and it works beautifully because we get to read how Sheldon plans his episode and what his thought processes throughout the script are. He goes step by step through those seven plot elements, and voila, in the end it turns out we have come up with pretty good storylines and a script.

Other than that, there's stuff like editing your script and how to rewrite dialogue among other things that are really valuable. Brevity in scriptwriting is usually a virtue, so it doesn't hurt that Sheldon chimes in on that.

I also have to say that there's another big gem in the book besides that 'unwise decision' and that is Sheldon's advice that you should write your script as a drama first. After all, jokes are easy, storytelling isn't.

That's my advice to you too, because if you find a way to tell a dramatic story without threatening the status quo (character relations), you're almost bound to write better scripts than even the showrunners on their shows. If you understand drama and characters, you really don't need to understand much else.

Besides teaching us how to write a script, the book also has a second part which is about landing your job as writer. There's a lot of stuff about being a writer on a show, about agents, how to deal with network executives, what it feels like when you get rewritten and other useful things about how you should prepare yourself when you get your lucky break.

All in all, Elephant Bucks is one the very few books out there that actually makes sense and doesn't confuse you. What more as a writer can you ask for? 

Similarities between poker and writing.

Above is a picture of Phil Hellmuth, a rather famous poker player who a month or so ago won his 13th World Series of Poker bracelet. (He has won more than any other person.) 

Now, the reason that I write about this is that poker and writing aren't that different in the end. Both are about understanding structure and about understanding players (characters). If you're not good at reading others or if you don't understand structure, you can't be a good poker player and you can't write good scripts.

Structure is really important for you to understand. It's your blueprint that you build on. It's the most important thing when it comes to planning. It allows you to use the rational part of your brain. It's also something that can be somewhat learned.

For example, in poker structure dictates what you can do. There are strategies that need to be known, like the unexploitable way to play when you have a short stack. Understanding structure gives you ideas and there's pretty much a right and a wrong way to handle certain situations.

When it comes to structure in writing, you have to know a lot of stuff. Like how to use exposition, how to introduce new characters, where the act breaks are, how long the script can go and so on and so on. It's basic and quite simple but not necessarily that easy to master. Structure is crucial to know and there's usually a right and a wrong.

But what is more important in my opinion is one's ability to read. Your ability to read characters and players. Your ability to know where you and others are so that you can react to the situations in hand.

I think this is an ability that you don't hear about enough when it comes to writing. In poker, you hear about it all the time. The best player is the one who makes the best reads. So, why aren't the writers talking about the ability to read characters that much? It might be that the best character reader is also the best writer too.

Phil Hellmuth especially prides himself on his ability to soul read players. This allows him to live in the moment and lets him make decisions based on his instincts. He usually has a pretty good idea on when to call, when to raise, when to fold and when to shove it all-in. This talent allows him to win tournaments quite often.

This reading ability, I believe, is mostly a gift. Some people have it, most unfortunately don't. Without it, you're pretty much lost. Therefore it's more important to be a great reader, because structure is something that you can learn but reading ability is something that you can't.

When it comes to writing, if you know the characters, you can safely concentrate on your plots. After all, character is the plot. So, the better you are at reading characters, the better your storylines, the better your script and the better your ability to write eventually will be.

It's that simple and I guess that's the reason why it's so hard.