How not to write a show: Modern Family episode 4x22.

This was a boo boo that I didn't really expect too see on a show like Modern Family. I'm talking about the episode 4x22 'My Hero'.

I mean, I guess it started okay. We (Cam and Mitch) meet a person who turns out was Mitch's ex-partner. He invites them to a some sort of a fundraiser.

They say yes.

Still good. 'Something's going to happen'. A good way to start telling your story.

But when they get to the event..

..it turns out that this ex-partner Teddy who we had never heard about before.. ..is a close family friend of the Dunphys.

He's apparently friends even with Alex and Haley.

I was like.. what the..

Everyone in the Dunphy family knows this guy..  .. but I don't.

The last four years I've lived with these people and yet I had no idea this guy existed.

If this character really did exist in the Modern Family universe, we would have seen him already - many many many times.

That makes me wonder..

What else do I not know about my favorite family?

Are there other important characters on this show that I haven't heard about before?

Based on this episode, I guess anything is possible.

I mean, they might even have a kid in the household that we simply haven't seen yet.

Could it be that they're not even a real family?

What if..

Phil is really a space alien?

Obviously this is not how you're supposed to write a show.

Storytelling tips for sitcom writers (Modern Family).

I guess pretty much everyone knows that storytelling isn't easy at all - because it's really difficult. Yet, at the same time I don't see why anyone should make it seem any harder than it really is.

One of the things that makes sitcom writing seem so hard is that there are concepts out there that are not that clear or easy to understand. For example if you take a look at the standard list of plot elements, it consists of terms like:

1. Introduction.

2. Conflict.

3. Complication.

4. Climax.

5. Resolution.

In theory that's how it's supposed to be done. You come up with an introduction, then there's a conflict or conflicts, then you complicate the whole thing, then there's the climax and finally you try to find a resolution to your storyline.

 

Yet, I think this is not necessarily the right way to do it when it comes to sitcoms. The list above is ideal for plotting an episode for a show like Macgyver or House where you can bet your... house ..that you're going to have complications.

But it doesn't necessarily work that well in sitcoms. Words like conflict, complication and climax are pretty big, abstract and confusing. They are also pretty cold and negative terms too in my opinion.

For some reason most sitcom books that I have read include this five point list. What is worse is that this list is almost the only thing these books have to say about storytelling. (would you feel confident about writing scripts after reading that list?)

From my own experience I can say that these lists never gave me the courage or the confidence to write. I was never able to come up with anything that made sense or anything that was 'organic'.

In my opinion, it's much easier and much more character-based to come up first with stuff based on the following structure:

1. Something (like an event) is about to happen.

2. Something happens.

3. Reaction to something that happened.

This approach helps you to create storylines without making the process seem too difficult. It's relatively simple and for a reason. No need to immediately think about conflict which usually would mean 'mindless arguing' or complication which too many times turns out to be just a contrived cliche.

If you pay attention to the episodes of Modern Family, a lot of the storylines follow this formula. That is that something is about to happen, then something happens - it might be unexpected - and then there's a reaction to what happened.

If you analyze the show and think about its storylines, it becomes pretty clear that there aren't necessarily always big conflicts, complications or climaxes - even though you might think there would be - based on the standard formula.

Truth is that the more conflicts and complications you have in your script, the more negative and forced the episode is probably going to be.

Another thing is that the episodes only last 21 minutes, which means that you have to keep the storylines pretty straight. The simpler your structure is, the better your script probably is too.

So simple works and simple is good. If you worry too much about the big words like 'conflict' and 'complication', you'll never get started and you'll never finish your script.

Writing another Modern Family script: writing the script.

I did some actual writing this and last week and managed to write my third Modern Family spec script. Like I did with my second script for this show, my writing routine consisted of writing two pages a day, and that was basically it.

So, when I last time wrote here about writing this script, I thought about the storylines. However, I didn't really come up with any beats then. I had some ideas for the first two storylines but I was pretty much clueless about the third one. This meant that I had to do some serious thinking.

Not surprisingly, I feel that my third storyline is probably the weakest. The idea is about Cameron having a bathroom accident which leads to Jay and Phil coming to the rescue - kinda. This storyline wasn't easy to write but perhaps it taught me the most. I had to try to make the implausible somehow plausible.

Nevertheless, the first storyline was about Claire and Mitchell going to Sun Valley with Lily to figure skate. There they introduce Lily to the wonderful world of skating. They also manage to meet Brian Boitano - the olympic gold medalist (and an Emmy winner).

For some reason Boitano recognizes Claire and Mitch from their 'fire & nice' days and they decide to go for a lunch together. What happens is that this storyline culminates in Brian being disappointed with his life - or at least he's having a sad emotional day. This was for the sake of the story of course.

This storyline wouldn't really have been relevant without referencing the song 'What Would Brian Boitano Do?'. I just had to do it and Cameron gets the honor to sing the song over the phone, which hopefully helps to make this episode funny.

The third storyline was about Luke having a date. This was a good idea but I didn't initially have enough material to make it meaningful or emotional. That is before I came up with the idea that Alex is seemingly the only one who doesn't know.

So the way it goes is that Luke has a date, Alex is trying to figure out what's going on, then she's told she's pretty much the only one who doesn't know, then she confronts Luke about it and finally gets to know the reason why he didn't tell her - which makes her like him even more than she used to.

Those are basically the three storylines and I have to say that I was pretty afraid of writing this script. It's not easy to write when you have set the bar too high for yourself. Thankfully, I managed to write it and now I can finally do something else.

How much does money mean to you?

 

If someone gave you ten million bucks, would you quit writing?

I personally don't think I would and I bet most writers wouldn't quit either.

I mean, I'd be set for life and I'd be able to pay more attention to writing scripts.

But what if someone gave you 500 million dollars on one condition - that you could never write again?

I know the question is absurd - but let's speculate. How many writers would quit?

I'd think that almost everyone would take the money and run.

Would I do the same?

I mean, I'm not sure I really care about being rich. Money doesn't necessarily buy happiness.

In many ways I think that writing scripts is the best thing that has happened to me - the best thing that could ever happen. 

So I mean...

But what if you could save the world by never writing again?

Tough call.

Writing about personal stuff.

I can't really give myself credit for coming up with this topic. I got it from Sheldon Bull's blog where he wrote about 'personal stories' a week or two ago.

So, the question is, should you write about stuff that's happened to you? Are these things, events, problems or whatever they might be, worth telling?

Sheldon on his blog pointed out that he used to write scripts about his personal issues and that those scripts never really went anywhere. Pretty quickly he though understood that there are other ways to make it so he decided to try sitcoms instead - which turned out to be a good decision.

When it comes to me, I can't really say that I'm a fan of writing about myself. I don't see much entertainment in things that have happened to me or in things that have been done to me. I don't see how my personal problems would be important enough so that I would have to write about those.

In many ways I think personal issues in the script are usually the weakest part of it. This is because you're too attached to your feelings and you're not able to see the forest for the trees. That is that you're not able to distance you from yourself.

For example on Girls, by far the least interesting stuff is about Lena Dunham's obsessive compulsive disorder. Every time you see her ocd on screen, it just doesn't fit in at all. It's not well written, the exposition is bad and there's way too much emphasis on it.

Another good example comes from the same show, from Judd Apatow that is. I don't know where he got the idea to write about his Hollywood problems in 'this is 40'. It was simply stupid and boring. Just like with Funny People, he was probably the only guy on the planet who thought the movie was worth making.

Or how about Leonard's awkward mother monologues on the Big Bang Theory. Man, does the showrunner have issues or what. It's just embarrassing to see these out of nowhere moments every now and then. It's too obviously personal stuff - and not interesting.

There are exceptions of course - and not surprisingly David Kelley is probably the best example with Ally Mcbeal. She was clearly his alter ego and yet for some reason he managed to pull it off. The personal stuff was entertaining and relatable at the same time.

I guess that's at least partly because he made the character a woman instead of making her a man. This had to help. Another thing was of course that he had something real to say, which is rather rare in today's world.

But in any case, when it comes to writing, I don't think scripts should be that much about you or yourself. In the end what matters more is that it's about us all.

Monday Mornings - getting much, much better.

When I reviewed the pilot episode of Monday Mornings, I wrote that the show was too much about death and not enough about life.  I wasn't sure I would keep watching the series.

Nevertheless, since there aren't really that many good shows on air nowadays, I decided to give it another chance. This was a David Kelley show after all.

Thankfully, the second episode was much better. Instead of being depressing, I felt it was life-affirming - unlike the pilot. I found myself really liking the storyline about the girl who wanted to die with dignity instead of going through a high-risk surgery.

'Deux Ex Machina" was a really good episode but at the same time I kinda thought we had seen the best already. The actress who played the girl was so phenomenal. The scenes with her and Alfred Molina were that captivating.  I didn't think we would be able to see stuff as good again.

Fortunately two episodes later it turned out that I was wrong. Because a week ago aired 'The Legend and The Fall" with Hal Holbrook - as the veteran surgeon who was getting too old. This episode was even better than the second one.

In many ways it was incredible to see an 87 year old  'own' like Holbrook did here. The minute you recognized him as the actor behind the surgeon's mask, you had the feeling that this was likely going to be something special.

Just like on the second episode with the young girl, the scenes with Molina and Holbrook were spellbinding. It was so fascinating to watch and try to guess if there was something wrong with the old guy and whether he was still in shape to perform operations.

In the end, not only was this episode dramatic - the final scene was chilling to say the least - but it was also very funny. Ving Rhames gave me the biggest laughs in months and the cold open also had a Kelleyish twist that probably made you laugh too.

 

So, anyway, based on the first five episodes, if you appreciate quality writing and acting, I think Monday Mornings is a clear winner. Whether the show gets renewed, well, that's of course another story.

Celebrity Apprentice 2013 - and justice for all?

When I heard about the cast list for this year's Celebrity Apprentice, I thought it was a some kind of a internet joke and that they wouldn't make another series. Not with these contestants at least - and there's no way they would call it an 'all-stars' season.

Well, it turned out that this joke wasn't just a joke, they actually did a new series with these celebrities. What's worse, it really is supposed to be an 'all-stars' season.

I think it's pretty safe to say that most people who had seen Gary Busey, Dennis Rodman and Omarosa, didn't want to see them again. We already saw enough and what they did on the show wasn't something that you could be proud of. They shouldn't have been brought back.

I mean, Celebrity Apprentice is supposed to be about doing good things for people in need. It's supposed to be about the contestants gathering money for their personal charities, which is admirable. Yet for some reason the producers in charge of the show don't seem to think that is enough.

Why not? It should be enough. Everyone loves charities and a lot of people are interested in knowing a little bit more about famous people. This is such a winning concept and nevertheless the producers want to ruin it - by trying to provide additional 'entertainment value' through freaks like Omarosa and co.

This is not something that I want to see. I want to see a fair competition where everyone who's good enough has an actual chance of winning. I want to see an uplifting show that has to do with honor and dignity, and respect.

What I don't want to see are the train wrecks who get exemptions week after week even when they contribute close to nothing to their tasks. I hate seeing their stupid bickering when there's no reason for that.

I especially hate seeing contestants getting fired for no good reason at all. So this season I can't believe what I saw.  Bret Michaels was fired for no reason at all. It was like the dumbest thing I've ever seen on tv. "You won before - you shouldn't have come back - you're fired".

I can't believe it.